okay then pipsqueaks.
tell us about your conquests.
have you killed a pig? or somehing bigger?
a troll perhaps?
give us all the gory details eh?

Pig? no sir....I got bambi, he just stood their looking at my headlights as i came busting through the turns.

i have wreaked havok on another board known as bizarroboard and i now come to conquer you all.

I fraged a pen full of chickens

no epic battles?
come on, you whelps.. you can do better than that!
so, escylacopa, did the chickens fight back??
how far did the battle go? did you recieve any wounds?
deraked, how much resistance did you ecieve when battling?
and lanosdrift... did bambi resist splattering? did it take out a giant axe of destruction and mangle your bonnet?

I got into a gun battle with the farmer that looked after the chickens. He got me in the shoulder damm near lost the arm. as soon as I recovered I got my revenge. I heard the funeral was nice.

a gun battle?
what was the circumstance?
did he eat your icecream?
did he laugh at your silly face? ho ho ho!
or did he insult your mother.......

I waged many wars. There were casualties on both sides. I got away with my army of ChaosZords intact though. Giant war machines, fashioned in all manner of shapes. They will do my every bidding...

I killed his chickens

He heard the Explosion saw me started shooting. I returned fire

perhaps i should share one of my conquests?

it was a pleasant day, the fires were high. the walls were crumbling here and there.
beautiful.
i was just going out into the wilderness and into the trees.
al of a sudden a huge dragon came ambling toward me.
at first i thought it was spot, but then i remembered i had left him tied up.
so i jumped back just in time to avoid a roasting.
i had done nothing to annoy this dragon so was rather annoyed. this beast had attacked me for no good reson.
i unsheathed my blade and stood my ground.
this thing was fast. the wild ones seem to be a lot more ferocious than the teme ones so there i was ducking and jumping to dodge his swipes. i couldn't get near him. then i spotted a good tree with some excellently placed branches. i ran up to the tree and started snapping the branches one by one. the dragon came for me, so i ran in the other direction. it went on like this for a while me getting some shots in but barely hurting it.
when i finally got enough branches snapped i lured it away. then i ran as fast as i could toward the tree and at the last moment i stopped. the dragon was hurtling toward me and at the last moment i dived between its legs. the momentum kept the dragon going while it reeled around to get me. it kept going and ended upo impaled upon the broken branches i had prepared.
and that ws the end of him.
i must say i was quite lucky. if i hadn't found that tree i would have probably been done for.

No bambi put up no resistance, but i did run into a midget dressed as a rodeo clown. I didnt know they didnt travel alone, their like carnies theirs millions of them but i was able to run down all the freaky mini people.

I destroy many foes... I devour the remains...
Foolish John lost everything and now has given in to what he truly is... ME!

With every second he allows himself to play host to my whim I gain more intelligence until we truly become one being.... Then... then you will all become food for us. Gwuahahahahahahahahahah

I never do something as barbaric as 'killing'. I prefer the term 'Genesis'. I create. The process is a bit messy though. Heh heh heh. Those soft, delicious organs are so tender and easily bruised. Sometimes they just pop. But they do tend to leak even after I've created something new. Zsarmellus is my newest baby boy. He's made of fallen demons from all over the realm as well as any humanoid creatures dull enough in the head to wander my way. Yes yes yes. No stomach coverings, organs have to be held in place by wires and hooks. When he moves it's like a puppet show in his torso. So lively, so full of energy.

In faaact... I look forward to toying with your organs in the future. I wonder what I could make? Mmmm, the thought makes me all tingly. Fresh materials for my experiments always brings me happiness. All I need now is to find the proper way to run the Venom sac in Zsarmellus chest to the retractable fangs in his right wrist.

...ah, a pig...

such happy memories of training...

first kills, those furry little animals that looked so cute, so innocent... so dead

pigs and larger prey came later... to accustom one to the size of human prey

then came the first true kill

i will always remember how easy it was slipping the knife between flesh, how smooth their skin, how sweet the smell of blood, how warm it felt knowing that you had ended their life

the quick rush and thrust of the stroke, there was no battle, there was no warning, there was only me

they never saw me but i saw them

that was enough









ustatedaj starts at level 13

One day I was walking through a jungle and I heard strange buzzing noises in the trees above. Since I couldn't be bothered climbing I called for the Guyver and took flight using my gravity orb. I sensed something behind me and turned around to see a robotic monkey standing there with a blue lightsabre.

It jumped at me swinging it's lightsabre at me and I easily dodged the attacks and then I kicked it in the gut and I landed on a branch. The monkey jumped at me again and I fired a head laser at its shoulder.

The monkey flew back about 2 meters but then it threw its light sabre at me, which put a hole through the lower part of my stomach, just missing my gravity orb.

The monkey pulled out a double-sided green lightsabre from its robotic pocket and started slashing at me. I tried my best dodging but I couldn't really see lightsabre since it was green and so was the jungle.

I flipped backwards and fired a pressure cannon at the Robotic Monkey, putting a hole through its chest and destroying it.


I don't know why it attacked me but it was a pretty fun battle.